Thursday, June 9, 2011

Strength and Waiting

…if He wants anything of you, He will fit you for the work and give you strength.” -St. Philip Neri

Our Lord has done just that.  He brought us together and gave us the strength to build a special and tender union of heart, He gave us strength in our engagement, He brought us to our wedding day, and now He called my husband and I to the beautiful gift of Life.  The day we found out we were pregnant with our first child, our hearts swelled and we began the new journey set before us with the strength and grace that can only be given us by Him.

My pregnancy has been wonderful.  We’ve been very blessed.  There was, of course, the minor morning sickness, my ever changing body, and all the amazing milestones of watching my tummy swell, feeling our little one flutter in Mama’s tummy while at Christmas Mass this past year, feeling the kicks and movements become more pronounced and strong, Daddy being able to have his first look at my rolling tummy, Daddy *feeling* his little one in my womb for the first time, and so much more.

Our joy has since abounded and we continue to take these steps with eyes wide open always awaiting whatever will be around the corner.  Our pregnancy journey and life itself always seems to have a theme of *waiting*.  A number of people might not like the idea of waiting, and I know I definitely am one to struggle with practicing joyful and active waiting.  But, I do believe that there is a joy and active participation in the waiting that we experience and are called to.  In the waiting, if we find ourselves present to each moment, there is so much joy and comfort to be found, knowing that God has planted His Will and that something is happening.  After reading, Abandonment to Divine Providence by Father J.P. de Caussade, S.J., I gained this understanding and try to be aware of it is often as possible.

Throughout our pregnancy we have been waiting: waiting to be out of the first, second, and third tri-mester, waiting to see the heartbeat, waiting to hear the heartbeat for the first time, waiting to see our little one at his/her earliest stages, waiting to see our little one grow in my womb, waiting each new opportunity for a sonogram so we can sneak a glimpse of our little one dancing around, waiting to share the news with all our loved ones, waiting to know if I would have had morning sickness or not, waiting for the sweet and wonderful baby showers, waiting to know if our baby is a boy or a girl, waiting to grow so big that I waddle, waiting to share new experiences with all our loved ones, waiting to take our natural birthing class and prepare as much as possible, waiting to find the right name, waiting to share all these new moments and findings with my spouse and him with me, waiting for each new kick or movement, waiting for the next time our little one gets hiccups in my womb, waiting for home to change into a home that is awaiting its newest member, waiting on all the different stages of this Life in my womb, and ultimately, waiting to get to where we are today.

In our waiting we have been blessed.  In retrospect, I can say there has been joy and always something happening in each moment we breathed, all from His Hand who holds us.

The secret of waiting is the faith that the seed has been planted, that something has begun. -Fr. Jean-Pierre de Caussade

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