3/52ing, Celebrating, and Sheenazing

3/52

Bigfoot. 3. Wants to grow up, loves to give the best hugs, and wants to be a professional drummer.

Linus. 1. Loves his eehh-phatt (Translation: Elephant), nose-kisses, and mostly likes sleeping in his new toddler bed sharing a room with his big brother!

These brothers: Love the sunshine, sliding, and chasing each other.

Where I've been this week: Celebrating the gift of marriage God has blessed me with! My parents came in town on Tuesday, my husband took a half day as well as Wednesday off, and we have been out and about celebrating our 5 years together. We ate out a number of times (We heart good food and I'll be sharing our yummy finds soon!), caught a movie, ran some errands together, and just enjoyed each other. It. Was. Perfect. 

And y'all, I really am floored at the nomination for a Sheenazing award. I mean really really really really really really floored! But so very grateful! 

Years ago, I stumbled into this beautiful space of web. I journeled and journeled and journeled until my software engineer of a husband nudged me to get with the times. Got with them I did. We were, and still are, far from family. We wanted a way to keep in touch. To share our lives with them and friends. Never did I expect to find the beautiful community I have with this little space.

This Christ-filled blogosphere, evangelizing Truth and Goodness with an honest dose of I'm-walking-right-there-with-ya, has given me so much encouragement, joy, fun, laughs, and friendships. It's been an amazing journey that I never anticipated but am forever grateful for.

Which ultimately means, thank you, dear readers. Readers that are named as family and friends from prior to the birth of this blog and new friends that have found themselves in my little space of hodgepodge. I really can't thank you enough! And to any new readers over from Bonnie's, WELCOME!! So excited to have you here too!!

I pray that I can offer bits of encouragement and prayers as I have been encouraged and prayed for by others through the webs. I pray I can offer a little space for community and beauty on the days that are tough, rotten, and crazy as well as the days that are joyful and seamless.

Thank you. Thank YOU! THANK YOU! And, I'd hug y'all if I could because I'm a hug-er.

So on that note, if you feel so inclined to share a vote for me in the Miss Congeniality category, head over to Bonnie's! And at the very least head over to Bonnie's A Knotted Life to see how wonderful she is as well as find tons of other amazing new reads for your blog reader of choice!

Venerable Archbishop Fulton J. Sheen, pray for us.

Note: These photos were taken with my Android Nexus camera since I haven't been lugging around the Sony. ;) Hoping to have some Sony captures this weekend. 

One more note: Our anniversary is actually tomorrow and I really wanted to have the How We Met story up on the blog, but time has not been on my side for this post. I'm still aiming for it, but it's not a guarantee. Either way, expect it soon and get excited because it's kind of ridiculous.

homeschool: here I am, Lord

"Be strengthened in Almighty God and in the power of His might, for with His help nothing is difficult. Throw off the heavy load of your own will, cast aside the burden of sin, and gird yourselves as valiant warriors. Forget what you are leaving behind; strain forward to the great things before you. I tell you that every place where you set foot shall be yours. For the Spirit who goes before your face is Christ the Lord. He will carry you to the topmost peak in the arms of His love."

-Saint Francis of Assisi

Here I am, Lord.

There have been many times that Our Lord has moved me in a direction. He has given me these subtle nudges that have brought me to different places. He has called me. And, I have always done my best to respond with my Here I am, Lord. His sweet calls lead me to college, then to graduate school, and finally to various jobs in my directed field. They brought me to my husband and to motherhood. He has always been gentle. Always kind. Taking my hand in the direction He desires for me. All of these callings have been so fulfilling, regardless of how challenging they have or have not been. They have brought me a sense of peace. For this, and so many other reasons, my trust is wholeheartedly in Him. Or, at the very least, I am striving to always trust Him with all that I am as best as I humanly can.

Is it I, Lord?

In the past, some of the nudges or callings have been very loud and clear. He simply stirred my soul in a way that could not be ignored. Not until He received my Fiat, did I experience the Peace He was wanting to share with me. While others nudges have been softer, sweeter, and filled with gentleness.

I have heard You calling in the night.

Since marrying my dear husband, I have had various nudges. One, for example, is how He brought us to the conception of our firstborn - such a gift - that, in turn, made me a mother. Another would be when I discerned, greatly, on whether or not to stay home with my son or to return to work like so many before me. His calling always brought me home - sweetly and gently.

The peace I felt was something that could not be ignored. Still, today, I continue to experience this peace and joy as I journey through my vocation of motherhood in our home. While some may see it as a very inactive or passive route when compared to today's "shoulds", I see my present as one of the biggest fiats that I have given to my God. He called and, by His grace, I answered and continue to do so one day at a time. It isn't always easy, but He never said it would be. We now have two sweet boys under our roof and in this young Mama's care. 

I will go, Lord...if You lead me.

Here, recently, I have heard Him calling again. This nudge has been coming along over the past year and I have been answering by reading all the things, researching, discerning, praying, and more. I find that I am most at peace when I am not fighting the notion that was planted within my heart just like so many other seeds before. This new seed is no different than those before only because it is another step that He is asking me to take - to trust Him with. Does that make it any less surprising or unexpected? Nope.

I will hold Your people in my heart.

These recent nudges are about homeschooling. Yup. I said it. Eep, and wrote it! At the end of the day, I know some will think I'm crazy for even considering this kind of journey. Sometimes I wonder the same thing. But I always find peace in knowing God would never task me with something that He has not prepared me for in some way or another. I also know that God's Will for me is sanctifying and if this be part of it, then I want to let it be done unto me.


So with that, this coming year will be dedicated to learning as much as I possibly can about homeschooling (haha, there's that word again!). What are the day-to-day logistics? Which program will best fit our family? Conferences (was blessed to have already attended one! Yay, me!). Meetings. Research. and anything else I can get my hands on that will help me better understand what all this journey entails. I'm going to approach it as I've approached every journey I've ever taken, meanwhile, remembering these sweet words of wisdom from the Venerable Fulton J. Sheen:

"We always make the mistake of thinking that it is what we do that matters, when really what matters is what we let God do to us. God sent the angel to Mary, not to ask her to do something, but to let something be done.” 

-Venerable Fulton J. Sheen

Mary, Mother of our Lord, pray for our little family. 

Erring on the Side of Love

I shall accommodate myself to them as far as I can, and as long as I live I shall serve God in them in unfeigned love.-St. Bernard

Last month there were a couple weeks that had some moments of funk in them. The funk came and went at random times. My funk has lead me to, at times, feel insecure as a mommy. Insecure in my abilities, in my judgement calls, my decisions, my sense of accomplishment, and more. So, after the funk coming here and there as well as trying to embrace the day-to-day (or moment-to-moment, for that matter) call to love and selflessness of motherhood, I decided that being a mommy is tough stuff (Such insight, right?! I blame sleep deprivation. That is all.). As soon as I get a grasp of all the to-do's of my little one something new comes up that I have to figure out how to approach in the best and most loving way possible.

After some thought I realized that this experience of funk is a little different for me. Let me explain.

Prior to mommyhood, I graduated from high school and went on to undergraduate school to do the same, which then helped me get into graduate school. I went to graduate school which prepared me to become a licensed professional. I sought out mentors and maintained my caliber through my colleagues, supervision, and continuing education. I then transitioned to a new profession, after some discernment, through seeking out a mentor program. This mentor program as well as my new colleagues helped prepare me to be the best that I could be. Throughout all this time I've always had some sort of feedback, educational foundation, colleague, or book I could rely on for guidance, education, and encouragement.

All these things that I excelled at previous to becoming a mama all came with specific foundational preparations and societal/cultural praises. And then there was motherhood. My vocation. A vocation that I am so glad that I was chosen for by our Lord. The vocation of being a mother full-time so that I can raise my son and be the best wife possible. A vocation (not truly considered a career by our culture) but one that has challenged me more than the careers that I have experienced up to this point in my life. One that I've desired for so long. This vocation was a seed that was planted in my heart many years ago. A seed which I then nourished with prayer and the sacraments. And yet, after everything has been said and done, this beautiful vocation came with no instructions or educational preparation.

Sure, there is always the wonderful support and ways that are passed down from parents (which I do treasure and have helped), and there's what you can remember from growing up, the doctors who know best, the internet with a plethora of information, as well as all the oodles of books and theories that each have their own say as to what is the ultimate best thing for your child. All of these things are good (Sometimes overwhelming, but good nonetheless.). But when it comes down to the day-to-day, there is nothing that can prepare you for all that comes with raising another human being with a beautiful and perfect soul.

As you can only imagine, I am not a fan of the funk in any capacity except for this: that it has encouraged me to pray more, to seek God more, spend more time meditating on our Blessed Mother, to search from within and try to better myself, and to reach out to other moms. These amazing women who have been where I am now and the amazing ones that are exactly where I am now. The beautiful thing about my reaching out to these lovely women has been the responses that I consistently received. I've found there to be a common theme. A theme of love.

Which leads me to this new blog. The month of January has been devoted to transferring my previous blog to this present one. In this time I was forced to find a new blog title, which was exciting and exhausting because I, of course, want something that is meaningful and just 'perfect'. And like I mentioned before, through all my conversations with friends and loved ones, the theme of love was constant.

These friends and loved ones reminded me that no other person will love my child the way I do. That all throughout time, God intended for this little one to be under my care, and that that is good. That I should trust that. That I should trust the deep-rooted love that I have for my son whom I carried in my womb, by the grace of God. I was reminded that, because I love him so much, all that I do is therefore done with love by default. And as we all know, God is love, making my efforts of Him and good. I was also reminded that I am not alone. I was encouraged to trust the love and the path God has given to me that ultimately pours forth onto my husband, my son, my family, my friends, and all I meet.

During these times of prayer and reflection, I picked up a book that is very dear to me - Fulfillment of all Desires by Ralph Martin. In there he was talking about the fruits of our work. He was talking about love. At one particular part he was sharing about St. Bernard and how he preferred to "Err on the side of love" when it came to all things. That statement clicked for me. When in doubt, when I am confused, when I am insecure in my own abilities, I need just err on the side of love as well as remember the value of what I am doing which I was reminded of by stumbling across Venerable Archbishop Fulton J. Sheen's wisdom below.

To value only what can be "sold" is to defile what is truly precious. The innocent joy of childhood, the devotedness of a wife, the self sacrificing service of a daughter--none of these have an earthly market. To reduce everything to the dirty scales of economic values is to forget that some gifts, like Mary's, are so precious that the heart that offers them will be praised as long as time endures.
―Venerable Archbishop Fulton J. Sheen

After all the thoughts, prayers, and readings, the title of this blog was born. In my life, I do want to remember this. I want to remember how St. Bernard lived his life erring on the side of love rather than caution (i.e. fear, insecurities, doubt, etc). I want to emulate this way of love, all the while, remembering the value of motherhood - the vocation I have been gifted by my sweet Lord.

Hopefully I can continue on remembering this way of love and choose to live it with all that I am; meanwhile, soaking up all the amazing goodness my son and husband, family and friends all share with me.

Have you ever experienced feelings like the ones I mention? How did you discern them? Or was transitioning to motherhood one filled with grace and ease? If so, what's your secret?

St. Bernard, Pray for us.

Archbishop Fulton Sheen, Servant of God, Pray for us.

Married couples ought to pray together each night, for their commonprayer is more than the separate prayer of each. -Archbishop Fulton Sheen

Holy Family, Pray for us.

If human beings are ever to discover anything big, they must always be making themselves little; if they magnify their ego to the infinitethey will discover nothing, for there is nothing bigger than theinfinite; but if they reduce their ego to zero, then they will discovereverything big-for there is nothing smaller than the self. -Archbishop Fulton Sheen

People say that they will do; Christ says when we do, then we willknow. The seeds of truth sprout in the soil of obedience. -Archbishop Fulton Sheen

It is so important to listen to persons who come to us for help. Theyreveal not only themselves; they reveal ourselves to ourselves and makeus say: “There go I but for the grace of God. -Archbishop Fulton J. Sheen

One can never love in a hurry. -Archbishop Fulton J. Sheen

The higher the love, the more demands will be made on us to conform tothat idea. To a great extent the level of any civilization is the levelof its womanhood. When a man loves a woman, he has to become worthy ofher. The higher her virtue, the more noble her character, the moredevoted she is to truth, justice, and goodness, the more a man has toaspire to be worthy of her. The history of civilization could actuallybe written in terms of the level of its women. -Archbishop Fulton Sheen, Life is Worth Living

‎”Every mother, when she picks up the young life that has been born to her, looks up to the heavens to thank God for the gift which made the world young again. But here was a mother, a madonna, who did not look up. She looked down to Heaven, for this was Heaven in her arms.” -Archbishop Fulton Sheen

Thought this was beautiful and had to share <3 Thanks for the post Catholic Inspiration and anovaoo :)